Hey there. This is Lia from Team Social Anxiety Solutions.

Today, we will have a short chit-chat with our Sebastiaan van der Schrier who is also from Social Anxiety Solutions. And we want to talk about what’s coming up next year for you.

Seb, how are you doing today?

Seb: I’m good. A bit sleepy, but good. 

Lia: Early morning your time?

Seb: That’s right. Yeah.

Lia: Same here. We’ll get this short. And we’re doing this because we want to let you know what’s coming up. We want you to get excited about it. And how can you best prepare for what’s coming up?

I heard that we are doing the next 30 Days Social Confidence Challenge this January 1^st,. I want to ask:

What prompted you to create this program?

(1:02) Seb: Yes, well, I started the during the lockdown. And I had a lot of time on my hands. And I was looking for something productive to do. You know, it was a lot of fear and panic in the world, and I thought this is perfect to put a challenge together.

Especially because people with Social Anxiety tend to avoid situations and are more comfortable at home, and now it was kind of like the right thing to do to stay at home.

I’m like – this is perfect. This is just the right place for it.

And yeah, it started by just wanting to do something good in a time where it was pretty scary for most people, at least. That’s how it started.

Lia: Do you recommend this program to anyone, regardless of where they are in their journey?

(2:02) Seb: No, I recommend it to anyone who’s suffering from social anxiety. I don’t recommend it if you’re dealing with other issues like severe depression, bipolar, multiple personality disorder, etc.

This program is specifically focused on people suffering from social anxiety.

And for these other kinds of issues. This is not the right fit.

If it’s social anxiety you’re dealing with, it will rock your world beyond any program you’ve ever tried. I’m pretty sure.

Lia: Great. But why offer it for free?

I mean, I saw the testimonials being published on our YouTube channel. Thousands of people from the two batches we’ve done rave about the great results they’ve got out of the program.

So why are you still offering it for free?

(3:00) Seb: Well, good question, even though we went through the problems together.

Well, the reason I’m offering it for free now, compared to why I initially offered it for free, is different.

So initially, I offered it for free, just because it was locked down. And I wanted to put the put something good out into the world.

But what I discovered near the end of it was that people were enjoying the journey, so much in that, they are committed to overcoming their social anxiety that they wanted to continue.

Lots of people were saying in the comment section, “oh, my God, I don’t want this to end,” “I don’t want to be done with this.”

And I had planned to run the second version of my Social Confidence Community in August.

So, I was like, “Okay, I will just move this forward a bunch of months. And I’ll invite people to join that afterward”.

And so that’s what then happened.

And so now, I named that the Social Confidence Club, slightly different from the Social Confidence Community.

And so, I then offered people to continue that – to continue to journey.

When I’m saying that, people probably think, “Ah, it’s one of these 30 days, and I get sold into a bigger program”.

And that’s true.

That’s exactly what this is.

However, it’s for a very good reason.

These 30 days are kind of like an introduction to the work that I’m doing. And the value that I can provide.

In reality, the situation is that if you’ve been suffering from social anxiety for a long time, 30 days is not going to resolve it completely.

Some people get far along the journey, and we have released lots of testimonials from it every Tuesday since we’ve done the 2 30 day challenges.

But for most people, it’s just the start of the journey.

And it’s difficult for people to believe that you can overcome your social anxiety.

But within these 30 days, things are going to shift for you. 

You’re going to make progress, and you’re going to feel a bit less anxious

Your inner voice, your relationship with yourself, the relationship with the anxiety is going to change.

Your sense of hope about being able to overcome your social anxiety is going to be shifted around.

And that’s not with positive thinking. Just be positive and optimistic.

No, it’s not like that. It’s with actual facts about how your brain works, how your psychology is put together, and how you can step by step overcome it,

I teach you to five stages to overcome social anxiety.

And I introduce you to the journey of going from social anxiety to effortless social ease.

Now, for some, at the end of the 30 days, they want to continue.

And that’s what they can then do in the Social Confidence Club, where we take things to the next level.

Other people want to do the 30-Day Challenge; that’s perfectly fine.

It’s going to change your world, just those 30 days.

But why I do it for free?

It’s because it’s an amazing introduction to my work.

And for the people that want to continue and can afford it because we’ve got people from all over the world joining this.

There’s an extra thing forward.

But these 30 days are kind of like; I’ve been looking for social anxiety solutions for 19 years. I started when I was 17. I’m 36 now.

And this is the best of what I found, put together in 30 days, sequentially, step by step.

I’m not holding any information back.

So, it’s really, really amazing.

Lia: It does really sound amazing. Even the testimonials are saying the same.

So I want to know what’s most difficult about the 30 Day Challenge?

(7:20) Seb: Most difficult is actually getting started.

A lot of people sign up. And they don’t think, “this is something I can do one day. Yeah, that’s, that’s nice. I might do this”

But they’re not committed.

And so the Challenge is to get started.

Once you get started, that’s when you’ve got momentum, that’s when you’ve got the ball rolling because I will introduce concepts to you that you’ve not heard about, regardless of how much self-help, personal development you’ve studied.

There is something new for everyone in there.

There are countless comments from people who say that it’s like, “oh, I thought I knew it all, but I learned so much.”

There is difficulty in starting something new, just in general. If people want to lose weight or start exercising.

Here, this is very challenging because we’re talking about making a transformation.

And people falsely assume that they’re going to change themselves.

But actually, what the journey is about is unlocking the blocks, getting rid of the crap, the programming that is in the way of them naturally being themselves.

So you’re not changing into someone else.

You’re just becoming more comfortable being who it is that you truly are.

But that false assumption about change kind of stops people.

So the most difficult thing is actually getting started.

Last two challenges. More than 50% of the people that signed up never even started.

So that’s the biggest challenge. That’s it. So get started.

Lia: So for those who already signed up for the challenge, I just saw the forum, and we already have thousands of people joining on January 1^st.

What message do you have for them? How can we best prepare for the Challenge now?

(9:23) Seb: The best way to prepare is actually to do the social anxiety test.

So once you’re signed up, you have the welcome video, and then you have the social anxiety test.

The social anxiety test is simply a little pre-assessment that gives you an idea about where you’re at and what is coming up in the challenge.

So, we will be talking a lot about acceptance. We’ll be talking a lot about compassion. We’ll be talking a lot about subconscious resistance, and you’ll be testing where you’re at and what particular situations do you get anxious in? How bad does it get, and so on?

So then, you have the pretest, and you have a post-test.

Other than that, the only thing you want to do for preparation is to tell yourself, “I’m going to do this no matter what.”

No excuses. Whatever is going on in my life, “I’m going to dedicate these 20 minutes a day to actually doing this challenge.”

Lia: But there are still be people who would say, “Man, I don’t have time for this”, people are busy these days.

And even some of them are already part of a different program to overcome it.

So, what’s your message for them?

(10:37) Seb: Okay, well, I don’t know what program that is, if it’s getting you great results, you might want to continue it and do the 30-day Challenge in 2022.

But if you’re going to do this, prioritize this,

I’ve put everything into this.

And it’s simply a matter of priorities, everyone has 20 minutes a day.

So, there are no excuses.

Everyone has 20 minutes a day.

You can get up 20 minutes earlier, you can lock yourself in the bathroom for 20 minutes, there is a way for you to make this happen.

So when you hear that I don’t have any time – that’s actually your brain trying to sabotage you from getting started on making a change.

Because this conscious wants to keep things the same.

Because when things are the same, you’ve got this sense of control, because there’s not the unpredictable and the unknown that you have to deal with.

But that’s assuming that all change is equal, or this is a safe and beneficial transformation. And you’re going to go through it in a supportive way.

I’ll be there guiding you along the way.

We’ve got lots of people from the Social Confidence Club, who did the previous Challenge, or the previous two challenges will be encouraging you supporting you, guiding you, and it will be very friendly, non-judgmental, kind place where we’re all moving through these 30 days together.

Just get started.

Prioritize it, it’s worth your time.

Lia: It is the right mindset, right? Correct. Yep.

And for someone who is still hesitant to join, or maybe has this belief that” I am a tough case, I can’t change, I cannot overcome this” –  what message do I have?

(12:29) Seb: Okay. Well, I am a tough case. It’s probably the most common thing that I hear from people.

And that is because, for one, when anxiety triggers you, or intense feelings trigger you, it feels overwhelming, and it feels really strong. And it is impossible to think yourself out of that state.

And because that’s such a big thing that overtakes you, it can feel like you’re a tough case.

Aside from that, when you try other things that are supposed to work. And you try them, and initially you’re like, “Okay, I’m going to do this, I’m going to do this recommended approach to overcome my social anxiety”

And you put all this effort in and force yourself to do it, and you’re not getting the results that you want. That’s very discouraging.

That can make you start to think, “oh, my God, and there is something wrong with me. My brain is broken”.

And then you’re already a lot less likely to do something else.

Because it’s like, “well if I’m going to get my hopes up again, it’s going to get crushed. And I’m going to get that confirmation that I’m that I’m really broken and messed up and so on”.

And so then you’re even less likely your skepticism goes up.

So that’s what stops people from doing something because they’re like, “Well, nothing works for me.”

Well, that’s not true. You do not know that.

Because this is something you have not tried. And this is very different from most of the cognitive approaches that are out there.

We’re combining cognitive approaches, exposure, but not outside your home.

This whole 30 day challenges in the comfort of your own home.

And we’re using body-based tapping techniques to bring up and neutralize negative emotions.

And this is very, very different.

Even if you try tapping or if you try to EFT tapping before. You haven’t tried it in this way.

So give it a go, even nothing to lose, and you’ve got lots and lots to gain. Okay?

It’s okay to be skeptical. But skepticism. It just means you’re not gullible, right?

It’s just smart not to be gullible.

But if you’re not doing anything because of your skepticism, your skepticism is keeping you trapped.

So, prove to yourself that this is bullshit by trying it out and actually doing that attitude.

Because this is not a placebo effect, you don’t have to believe in it for this to work. This works.

Lia: And we always say that it is a journey, and up and down journey. And some of them can have setbacks during the 30 days.

What can you say about that? What message do you have for them?

 (15:40) Seb: Yeah, so, setbacks typically mean, I fall off the wagon, I missed a day, or I missed two days. Okay, why waste it? I ruined it.

No, no, no, that’s not true.

You simply fall fell off the wagon. What you can do is you can either catch up on those days, so do two days in one day, or skip those days, and just jump back onto the wagon, and continue where we’re where we left off.

Ideally, you do all of the days each day, that’s going to lead to the best results.

But if you miss days five and six, for whatever reason, and you don’t have the time, or you don’t want to do days five and six, simply go to day seven, and continue.

Will you get the same results that you would have gotten if you’ve done the 30 days?

Perhaps not. No. But it’s better to have 90% of the results than giving up there and only having like a tiny little bit, right?

Because this also builds on each other.

So it gets better and better and better.

I cannot give you everything on day one, because you’ll be overwhelmed and you won’t do it.

So I’m just feeding you like little bites, little pieces. So it’s easy for you to absorb and implement. And it’s all super simple.

Because what I learned is like when it’s simple and entertaining, people do it.

My biggest challenge is to get you started. Once you get started, you’ll start to enjoy it. And it’s simple. And you’ll begin noticing progress.

And as a result of that, you’ll be committed to the journey. And that’s what I want for you.

But you got to get started.

Lia: Before we end, any last words?

(17:41) Seb: Well, I’ll be a bit serious, then.

I come off quite light-hearted because I am quite light-hearted. But I do understand the suffering of social anxiety.

How alone you can feel and deal with it. And you are not alone.

In this fact, millions and millions of people are dealing with this, most of the people living with this in secret, it’s a very difficult thing to deal with.

It’s not fair to be really hard on yourself about it.

And there’s actually something that you can do about it.

That’s good news. It’s hard to believe that you can actually change when you’ve experienced this pain for such a long time.

But you really can change. You’re not born this way. It’s just a matter of programming that you’re now at the mercy of. And it’s very unfortunate, but it is the way it is.

But there’s something that you can do about it, you can learn these techniques, you can learn how to apply these techniques, you can get help with these techniques, if you need some outside help.

But there’s so much that you do not know that can empower you to give you the right perspective to overcome this problem in your life.

Not in these 30 days, most likely, but it can give you a good start.

And there are lots of people from the previous two challenges that we did who at the end of the 30 days significantly reduced their social anxiety or no longer dealing with a critical inner voice, and it had changed into like an inner cheerleader.

People are talking, “I’ve kind of become my own friend now”. These are huge transformations.

So this is not a life challenge where I give you a little bit of crap and hype you up. No

I’m not insanely optimistic either. I’m just giving you actual facts have been doing this. I’ve been creating YouTube videos since 2009. My website exists since 2008. I’ve been saying the same thing over and over. You can check it out. I’ve got a podcast where I interview psychologists, coaches, bestselling authors, healers, and psychotherapists.

This technique that you’re going to learn about or learn more about is scientifically proven to be effective.

It’s in the top 10 of the most researched psychotherapy techniques. It’s very powerful. And it can really change and make a difference for you.

And that change can be very gradual and very gentle. It’s not painful.

I really hope that you’re willing to give this a try and join us.

We’re a whole team of people. It’s me, Lia, Mae, and Maria. And it’s a whole bunch of the people that are in the Social Confidence Club who’ve done the 30 Day Challenge, who will be going through the challenge with you, supporting you making comments, if you choose to be there in the comment section, you actually don’t have to, you can completely anonymous in front of all this.

In fact, most people do.

However, there’s something special about it when you start making comments.

Basically, what I’m trying to say is like there is a way out of this suffering that you’re dealing with. And this is something incredibly empowering that you can do that’s going when you commit to it really kickstart 2021 for you in a very, very good way.

Go to bit.ly/socialconfidencechallenge

Lia: When you were saying that, that took me back from the two batches with it. Knowing those people who are saying that they got so much value from the program. The idea was in my mind when you were saying that.

So I do hope that you guys do register for the 30 Day Challenge. Again, that’s bit.ly/socialconfidencechallenge

And we’re really excited to do this once again with you. And if you’re ready, sign up. Listen to Sebastian’s words.

We hope that you actually do the challenge. We’re all in this together. Get Started.

Bye!  `

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Sebastiaan

Sebastiaan van der Schrier is a Social Confidence Coach and ex social anxiety sufferer. He helps socially anxious people become confident using a unique and painless approach. He is the host of the Social Anxiety Solutions podcast show and runs the first ever online Social Confidence Community.

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