SUMMARY
Some people think that for you to be able to overcome your social anxiety, you should be facing your fears.
Some people think that overcoming social anxiety is impossible.
And some people think that being on the right group or community while trying to overcome your social anxiety will help you achieve that goal.
Which one are you?
In this episode, I’ve gathered 12 comments from our Social Confidence Club members on the progress they have seen in the past 6 months.
It might be impossible for you to believe that these are true.
But trust me, trust them, and trust yourself that you too can be social anxiety free.
Trust the journey.
Trust the process.
Trust your self.
If you want to become a member of the Social Confidence Club, you can now pre-register by going to https://bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub. Be part of the awesome community that helps you overcome your social anxiety.
FULL TRANSCRIPTION
Most people believe that they are a tough case and that it’s not possible to overcome their social anxiety…
…even if they hear of other people that have made a profound transformation and overcame their social anxiety.
And the people inside our Social Confidence Club are no different than that.
Being a “tough case” is not true.
You know, it’s not that everyone’s a tough case. Some people are; some people are not.
But everyone seems to think that they are.
So, we do check-ins every month within the Social Confidence Club to check in with our members to say:
“Hey, where are you at? How are things going? What’s going well? What are your challenges? And how can I assist you to go to the next level?”
And we just did our six months check-in, and we got a whole bunch of answers. I picked 12 of them.
They’re not the 12 that made the most progress per se, though some of those are, of course in there as well.
But it’s more randomly selected to give you a bit of an idea of the different kinds of progress that people make.
And the different levels that people are at, or the different stages that people are at.
Because every person is unique, and therefore every person’s challenges are unique. And not everyone progresses in the same way.
You’ve got quick starters that may beat progress in the beginning and then plateau.
And you got slow starters that build up slowly, slowly, and then start to peak.
And there’s the up and down, up and down, up and down. And anything in between.
So, people are on different paths, but going in the same direction with the same outcome of social ease, and everyone is making progress.
A question that I asked last Sunday when we did our group check-in was:
“How were things before? How it was before the Social Confidence Club and think about how it is now and what’s better. What is the progress that you’re noticing?”
And here are some answers:
X:
“I have more acceptance”
“I understand my behavior better”
“I feel calmer in social situations”
Andrew:
“I have less anticipatory anxiety”
Andrew:
“My anxiety during video meetings went down”
Alex:
“I am accepting my physical sensations a lot more. For example, when I am blushing, it’s not really my fault in this situation. I am a lot calmer even if I feel a lot of physical sensations in social situations.”
Danielle:
“I feel less anxious. Particularly in some situations, I don’t feel anxious anymore.”
“ I am more able to sit with the anxiety, feel it, and be OK with it. And not think that it will spiral out of control.”
Lou:
“ I feel less anxious than last year. I feel more free to be myself. I accept the fact that I will blush and sweat at times. It’s the way it is. I am more in acceptance of it.”
Phoebe:
“I am not so hung up on people pleasing”
“I am less hard on myself”
Brenda:
“I feel more compassion for myself.”
“I feel more calm.”
V:
“I am less afraid of people criticizing, being angry, or being disappointed with me.”
Rob:
“I have way more energy than I did last year.”
“I am less self-centered. In the last couple of months, I find myself saying things that I definitely wouldn’t have said a year ago.”
Josefin:
“I feel much calmer in 1-on-1 situations.”
“I am not worried much with how I should I come across.”
Becca:
“I noticed this year I am involved in 2 social groups other than this Club. I look forward in being in them. There is no dread.”
“When I am in a group, I don’t have to hold the conversation. I can allow myself not to say anything and just let it flow. It now feels more relaxing to be a group.”
Mary:
“Before SCC, inviting people was my biggest thing. Last week, I hosted a party of 40 people.”
“I am able to talk to people who I used to feel were superior. Because of that, my business has started to take off. It’s been awesome to unlock such potential.”
Alright, I hope that inspired you.
What I want to say is that these are very realistic results. This is not some hyped-up nonsense. This is the truth.
And the truth is that social anxiety is a complex issue to deal with.
And underlying social anxiety is at the core. The root of it is trauma that needs to be dealt with. There are lots of issues that are the result of the anxiety that you’re dealing with. And so, there are lots of feelings about the problem.
There are worries and things, and ideas that you can overcome it, and there’s all of these negative fantasies that you’ve built up in your mind, there are lots of things to look at in order to overcome this issue.
But just because it’s complex doesn’t mean you cannot overcome it.
It just means that the problem needs to be broken down, and you need to chip away at the smaller pieces, the smaller parts of the problem, because when you take one part of it away, it shrinks a tiny bit, does that lead to true life-transforming changes?
No, but it makes it a tiny bit better.
And when you do that enough, over time, your life keeps improving a little bit and a little bit and a little bit and a little bit.
And that leads to what you’ve just heard:
- less anxiety
- less intense anxiety
- not getting triggered in situations where you used to get triggered
- feeling more calm
- having more self-compassion
- being able to freely express yourself in more and more situations with more and more people.
So it’s a gradual process.
And we are just six months in.
And at the beginning of the Social Confidence Club, we are building a lot of foundations, were facilitating a lot of compassion, and understanding of what’s going on, why you’re dealing with what you are dealing with, and why a lot of the things that you tried in the past didn’t work.
And I help our gang to get to understand like, “hey, there might actually be a chance here that I can make progress.”
And then we start focusing on actually making that progress. And then you start to build on that and you hear other people make progress.
This community approach to overcoming social anxiety is surprisingly effective, especially combined with the wonderful combination of traditional psychology and energy psychology.
I’m excited about where we’re at and where things are going. And the best is yet to come. We’re only six months in and we got roughly five more months to go before the next Social Confidence Club opens.
This is a message to inspire you, and also a message to say, hey, if you want to be part of the next one, make sure that you’re on the early subscribers’ list to get early notifications when we do open up because there will be limited spots available.
And if that’s something of interest to you, then you can go to bit.ly/socialconfidenceclub
I hope this inspired you.
And I hope it has given you a bit of an idea like:
“Ah, okay, it’s not going to be an overnight transformation. But when I actually work on this, I put in the effort I heal my traumas, I shift my beliefs, I get rid of these negative fantasies and I apply the tapping over a period of time, I can actually start to decrease my anxiety so I get triggered less.
I can let the intensity get less and less and less, and I can increase my peace of mind and my inner sense of calm. I can become more okay with myself bit by bit step by step.”
That is the journey to effortless social confidence.
Hope has helped you
Talk to you very soon.
Bye for now.
If you experience Social Anxiety, click below to receive the FREE “7 Secrets to Social Confidence” Mini Course!
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