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Heal Core Social Anxiety Issues by Watching Others



I’m sharing something really awesome that may help you heal some of your core social anxiety issues.

This is healing you can do by watching and tapping along to another person’s coaching.

In EFT land it’s called Borrowing Benefits.

Learn more about how you can benefit from this and hear a testimonial from someone who experienced it from one of my webinars.

Stay tuned because we will be having more of these webinars where you may receive direct coaching or choose to heal your issues while privately tapping along to someone else’s coaching.


Sebastiaan: Hi, this is Sebastiaan van der Schrier from I’m a former social disorder sufferer. I’m a host of the podcast “Social Anxiety Solutions”. I’ve got something very exciting and fun and cool today.

So, what am I going to do?

I’m going to read to you a testimonial. I think these testimonials are very inspiring and I’ve got lots of them. We’ve been thinking of starting like “Testimonial Tuesday” or something but I don’t use them often enough so I’m considering doing that more. At least I’m going to do it right now.

What is this testimonial from? These testimonials are from my new product that I created a month ago. Last month I started life coaching webinar series where I coach someone. Her name is Mahsa, over a period of five live webinars to overcome her fear of negative judgement which according to the poll that I sent to my email list is the number one fear of everyone who has social anxiety. It might not be yours but it’s the number one fear for most people.

People have bought access to that and so they have been observing me doing these coaching sessions with Mahsa.

As I work with Mahsa through her unique issues because social anxiety is so similar and everyone watching these webinars are tapping along with them, they get massive benefits, they experience cognitive shifts, they release their emotions, they make progress, release their resistance and it’s a fantastic setup.

There’s something in EFT land, in tapping land – Emotional Freedom Techniques. That is called borrowing benefits and they discovered that early on in the EFT land. And what they found out was that well, one of the earliest signs was that EFT practitioners when they would work with their clients at the end of the day, they didn’t feel exhausted or drained because they were always tapping along with their clients. That’s very different from most therapists or life coaches.

They don’t necessarily get the same kind of results because their clients get into their past and can be heavy emotional stuff that comes out but EFT practitioners would be tapping along with their clients and they found that they kind of felt energized or got relief as they worked with their clients. Which is something I experienced as well, I enjoy my sessions a lot, they’re great.

What they didn’t discovered in EFT land was that they started doing experiments where they had Gary Craig, the founder of EFT, worked on in front of the room with someone with a particular issue, say a spider phobia, and they would ask all the volunteers in the room to pick a specific memory and to write it down on a piece of paper and put it on their seat and then just tap along with the session with Gary and the lady with the spider phobia.

The people that would write down the memory would have to rate on a skill zero to ten how intense it was. What they didn’t found at the end of the session was that Gary helped the lady clear her spider phobia but all the people in the room that were attending to tap along they at the end pulled back a piece of paper and looked at the memory and the memory wasn’t an eight out of ten anymore but a two out of ten or a one out of ten or sometimes completely neutralized even though they didn’t focus specifically on their memory. Their subconscious somehow make that link.

Now, there have been three more tests. Scientific tests that have been done, scientific studies I should say by Dawson Church – PhD, researcher. You can find that link here. Presuming I don’t forget to put it in. That’s the concept of borrowing benefits.

Now, I started last year in my social confidence community and it consisted of three elements. It was a drip fed content, tapping lessons, how to tap specifically to overcome your social anxiety, a forum where people could ask questions and give feedback, share their stories and connect. And lastly, live webinar. I would coach people live and people would follow along and do the tapping and they got amazing benefits just from tapping along.

At the end of running the community I found that I didn’t have so much volunteers so I would have recurring volunteers. I worked with a few of them for like two or three sessions in a row or like spread out over only a couple of weeks. There was a lot of benefit in that because you saw them make that transformation and every time that they showed up.

For example, they show up for session one, we make progress. Session two, she now reports on the progress that she made as a result of session one. Session three she shows up and she reports in the progress that one and two have done for her and shows what her remaining sticking point is. Like “This is great, we need to do more of this”.

That’s how I came up with the idea of doing these live webinar series on a particular topic. So, very focused and very niched. I ended up working with Mahsa and we focused on her fear of judgments – That’s the goal with this series. To get help her get rid of her fear of judgment and simultaneously for all the people tapping along with it to resolve their fear of judgment.

The amazing thing is that this is actually working. It is really, really cool. I’ve got about 30 comments of people having made a transformation just from watching and tapping along because I think this is like borrowing benefits on steroids because you can relate to the person on screen because they have social anxiety too and while your issues, the root cause of your social anxiety are different, they’re very similar in a way so you can relate to the emotions.

Yeah, I don’t know exactly how it works but it works magically well. Social anxiety has a lot of similarities to it.

Everyone who has social anxiety has resistance to letting go of it. Everyone who has social anxiety is not in the acceptance of the anxiety when it comes up. Pretty much everyone who has social anxieties are judging themselves for it. Almost everyone who has social anxiety is afraid of becoming anxious and other people seeing it. And I could go on like this for a while.

The person that I work with on screen has the same issues as the people that are watching it and so, as a guide Mahsa on screen to release her issues with the people tapping along it’s like it’s a private coaching session.

Anyway, I have lots of comments that were made under these replays of the live webinars that I did inside “Overcoming the fear of judgement” coaching series.

I’m going to read one of them to you so you can get an idea of what I’m talking about. All right, here we go. Now with full disclosure I have added it out a question that was asked in it. I just kept the juicy parts of it.

“During this series I’ve realized many things that I haven’t seen before”. I guess those are the cognitive shifts that you mentioned and it’s been such an amazing experience for me. Just to notice what gets triggered in me during webinars is enlightening and maybe also a bit overwhelming but I’ve tapped on that so I’m fine for now.

And then those shifts, for example, I’ve never realized how much I was stuck or rather fused with my childhood garbage. You dealt with that in the bonus video and I just wanted to mention it. Just the idea of not having this childhood garbage felt so bad and weird. I feel even guilty.

It was a huge shift for me because I don’t have to have it and with your help, I managed to release a big part of the web. The overall mood set and feelings from my childhood and it feels so good and so liberating to not carry that around anymore. I’ll still have to address specific memories but now I have a mindset that it is possible to not have it and be okay. I’m really happy for that. Another big shift for me was when you addressed change. The fear of change. Since then I really feel like it’s possible.

Before I knew it but now I kind of feel it. It feels like it’s no problem actually. What also really hit home was when you tapped on acknowledging emotions because I tend to follow a pattern of avoiding and repressing them. So, after that tapping I felt another shift. Anyway, these past few days I’ve been able to not feel anxious during few social situations where I get very anxious. I was even shocked when the anxiety didn’t show up.

That’s a huge improvement for me and it motivates me a lot. So, once again, thank you very much for what you’re doing. I really appreciate it.”

It was just one of the many comments. This is very exciting; This is what’s going on. There’s one more live webinar that we have which I’m going to have with Mahsa very soon. To be continued. You’re going to hear about this at some point in nearby future but I just want it to prime the pump or let you know what’s going on with a little update on what’s been happening with that. I think it’s also quite inspiring to hear a testimonial like that.

I think I’m going to be using more of those because I realized that I make a lot of decisions based upon testimonials that I read. Any place that I stay, any place that I go, I’m always checking the reviews. So, I think it’s going to help you.

All right. So, I hope it’s been helpful. Subscribe here and I will talk to you very soon. All right, bye for now.

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