As a psychotherapist myself with a history of social anxiety, talk therapy alone just wasnāt cutting it. Now I see the value of using a strong experiential component to give the painful feelings a chance to move out after being evoked.
Thatās why the tapping works so well and quickly. It helps move out the feelings that Sebastiaan helps to call up.
Before I started tapping with Sebastiaan, I struggled with social anxiety for years worrying about sweating and blushing, embarrassment and humiliation, and anticipating all kinds of situations with trepidation.
I would isolate and hide to protect myselfā¦
... and Iām a person who loves connection.
But I was really afraid of being judged as a freak and then devalued, rejected and dismissed because of it. It really limited my life.
It created unnecessary dependencies and A LOT of negative thoughts and beliefs about myself, a lot of shame, hopelessness, fear and an unwillingness to move forward in life. Boy was I doing a dance to get through every day.
The frustration and all that toxic energy that I was holding in my system was very uncomfortable. I was afraid to go to parties and definitely really scared to go alone.
I felt like I needed to please people to be accepted. I would hide from authority figures. I had trouble being assertive even though I have strong preferences.
The tapping sessions Iāve been doing with Sebastiaan have helped significantly. I have been in a lot of different types of therapy over the years and for me, this one is remarkably effective.
The combination of the tapping technique and Sebastiaanās skills and insight have created more forward movement in a short period of time than ever before.
He really is an expert on social anxiety and all of the traps that a person with social anxiety finds himself in.
And Iām not gonna lie, Iām so impressed by him. Itās the combination of his ability to be highly attuned and so articulate that works so well.
His precision cuts through the walls and defenses, gets me in touch with the deeper feelings and assumptions, and with the tapping, moves it outā¦ all while giving me a new and more effective way to frame how I can approach future situations feeling safe and interested in embracing life.
Iām happy to report that now Iām trying lots of things that I used to be afraid of.
Iām more interested in going to parties and Iām actually enjoying them. Iām less isolated and feel more secure with myself to engage with all different kinds of people.
Iām getting more in touch with whatās important to me and feel hopeful, and Iām so much less depressed.
My anxiety has reduced significantly.
When I do feel anxious as I try new things, I donāt shame myself for blushing or sweating or looking nervous.
Iām more proud of myself for sticking with it even when itās uncomfortable.
Recently, I invited someone I was chatting with in line at a restaurant to join me and have a meal together. I NEVER would have done that before. It was exhilarating.
I went to a wedding reception on my own and it was fine. Iām excited to keep discovering myself. Iām excited to keep trusting myself and what I know is important to me. Iām learning to be less afraid of the unknown.
Iām even learning to let go of other peopleās perceptions of me as I concern myself more with my own self acceptance.
My advice, give Sebastiian and this process a try. The proof is in the pudding. Youāll know if itās working in a short period of time. No need to guess.
āI am finally taking charge of my life...ā
I had just graduated with a Masters degree followed by a promotion, but my life felt so meaningless.
The anxiety kept pushing through to the point where it was even waking me up in the middle of the night. My marriage became all about avoiding arguments and dealing with 8 years of infertility.
I had no friends, a negative outlook on life and could not be seen in public without imagining everybody judging me.
After a little short of a year of coaching with Sebastiaan I have a wonderful best friend, improved my relations at work, have stepped up in my career in the sense that I am managing other people for the first time in 22 years and am finally taking charge of my life.
It's also great to notice that my outlook on life is naturally positive.
I am not exaggerating, but after each session I go to take the bus and tend to attract people towards me for a chat!
Sebastiaan is really great to work with, he has this way to come down to where you are and make you feel comfortable, gently leading you to where you want to be.
He also has a great sense of humor thus putting fun in the process!
I am not where I want to be yet, but I discovered that the key is in accepting our limitations and be kind to ourselves.
Angie