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When you learn how to make friends you are literally opening up the world you are living in. Because, instead of merely having the social circle that you automatically formed growing up, you will have the opportunity to create amazing social lives anywhere you go.
This will in turn give you more confidence when you start a new job or when you move to a different place or country.
And it will also give you the freedom to comfortably join a new sport and any other activity that gets you out of your comfort zone for that matter.
Since you know how to make friends, you feel at ease because you know from previous experience that you have the “skills” and personality to pull it off. They will like you.
There are several ways of making friends and they of course depend on the circumstance.
This article will provide tips and techniques on how to make friends and keep them.
Act as if you’ve been best friends forever.When you are around people you want to be friends with, act as if you guys are already best buddies.
Your energy, or vibe that you’re giving of is contagious. So if you feel uncomfortable they will and if you feel comfortable they will also.
You are comfortable around your best friends so act as if they are already best friends and they will feel comfortable around you as well.
They will assume you like them and this in turn will make them like you. People like people that like them.
Laugh at their jokes. Don’t start laughing outrageously when you don’t think it’s funny, but when they make a joke at least give an approving grin.
Save them. When there’s an uncomfortable situation and you see your soon to be new friend choking up or not knowing what to say, save him! Take the attention off him or her by cracking a joke, telling a story, making a comment or asking a question… “Anyway, what are the plans for X?”
You come off as someone who knows how to make friends, very socially savvy.
Tease. Often people that are close tease each other a lot. It’s a fun way of communicating and is a sign of having a bond together. It shows that you feel you can’t do anything wrong and it frees up the communication between the two of you.
Open up. Tell something about yourself that people might not expect or know about you. I wouldn’t advise you to tell sobbing love stories the first time you meet, but when it’s appropriate, open up.
Be curious. Try to get to know the person by asking them questions. Find commonalities. Ask personal questions about their family and life. Try to get to know them, find out what’s interesting about this person. Find his/her passion.
People who know how to make friends know it’s more important to be able to make someone feel special than to come of as an interesting person yourself.
Take on every social invite.When someone invites you to an event… Go! To become part of the crowd they need to get to know you. This doesn’t happen when you show up once a month.
If you keep rejecting their invites they won’t invite you anymore. When you see people again and again a bond and friendship occurs naturally.
Have a good hygiene. It’s annoying when you smell bad! Brush, use gum or something for fresh breath -especially if you smoke-. Use deodorant and be clean in general. Also, stuff in your nose and ears isn’t pleasant to look at. Though a friend should tell you about that though!
Socialize! That means talking to everyone. Keep in mind that most people know how to make friends and are eager to do so. Almost everyone enjoys meeting a friendly person and most of them will be friendly in return. Talk to the people who are shy as well, try to make everyone have a good time.
Be positive. Nobody likes whiners. You can whine a bit from time to time, but make it funny if you do so. Emotions are contagious so make sure you’re positive and fun to be around with. People will feel good around you and want to hang out with you again.
Follow up. If you have a great interaction with someone, steer the conversational to a social topic and exchange contact info. Find out things they do, parties they go to, hobbies they have, social events etc. And be very curious about these things.
They will probably invite you and if they don’t they might be afraid of you rejecting their offer. If you feel the conversation is going great and you guys are connecting you can ask if you can join.
Say something along the lines of “It’d be cool to experience that also sometime, can I join you sometime?” If they come up with excuses don’t persist on inviting yourself. If they react positively then say “great, let’s exchange numbers”.
Help out. When your friend is moving to a new place, offer to help out. It’s what friends do and of course the next time you are moving…
Emotionally support. Be the shoulder to cry on when necessary. Be the one that drags your friends out of their misery and force them to do something fun and get them out of a rut. Do something nice for them, make them feel appreciated.
And of course, think of them when it’s their birthday, congratulate them when they accomplish something great etc.
Have different friends. The more different personalities of friends you have the more versatile you become as a person. I personally highly recommend this as you will be able to become friends with just about anyone.
If you don’t like this and want all like-minded friends, then talk to those more but be friendly to everyone anyway. The people you don’t want as best friends might have friends that you do want to be friends with.
It basically means that you must be a likeable person because you have a group of people hanging out with you. If you’re hanging out with friends, talk to other people and invite them to join your group.
Do activities that involve emotions. There’s no bigger bonding tool than emotions are. Go rafting, play paintball, camping etc. Even be the one who initiates it, it’s great to do this.
If you organized something that turned out great people will remember it. And even if it was a disaster people will still appreciate the effort.
I travel a lot and am currently once again living in a different country. I therefore really have to know how to make friends… I investigated several ways of doing this. One of them has been the internet and all I can say is… It’s awesome!
There are a lot of websites that are great, but personally I use the websites below to the most:
Facebook This one is pretty obvious, but it’s great to stay in touch with people and share pictures. You can comment on pictures and write personal and for-all-to-see messages. When you meet someone new, add them to facebook.
Couchsurfing This is by far the best website on how to make friends and improve your social life ever created. Especially if you like to travel and/or are interested in meeting people from other countries.
It’s a website for travelers and it basically is a site that gives you the opportunity to sleep on someone’s couch when visiting a different city or country. And, you can offer your couch to people visiting your city/country.
Aside from that it also offers you the opportunity to meet like minded people in your city as there are online chat groups that organize trips and meet-ups in your city.
People on this site are verified users so you don’t have to worry about weirdo’s… Did I say it’s a great site?
You now know the basics on how to make friends. Some of them are obvious, others might be not. As a last thing I’d like to reassure you that it’s pretty easy to make new friends. Just be honest, positive and treat them as you like to be treated yourself.
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“Become Comfortable Starting A Conversation With Anyone”
Go to Part 1/3: Asking Questions To Start Conversation?!
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“Starting Conversations 101”
Go to Part 1/4: Creating Interesting Conversation Starters
Go to Part 2/4: Steps To Creating Your Own Good Conversation Starters
Go to Part 3/4: How To Start Conversations
Go to Part 4/4: Mentally Rehearse Your Conversation Openers
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Go to Part 1/2: 24 Interesting Conversation Topics
Go to Part 2/2: Conversation Exercises For Conversation Confidence
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Go to Part 2/2: Questions To Keep Conversation Going?
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