SUMMARY
In today’s episode, I will let you watch and witness a live coaching session I did here on YouTube.
It’s a “never-have-been-done” event, a unique coaching session that you will surely find relatable and beneficial.
Witness how these socially anxious people get relief right in front of your eyes using the EFT Tapping technique.
In this particular session, I was working with Victoria in terms of #RaisingTheResistance to #LettingGo of #SocialAnxiety and doing #self-acceptance works.
Watch, relate, and tap-along to get relief from your own social anxiety.
Get the full session here: bit.ly/livesocialanxietycoaching
FULL TRANSCRIPTION
Hey! My name is Sebastiaan van der Schrier. I’m a former Social Anxiety Disorder sufferer and a Social Confidence coach. In this brief video, you’re going to see a snippet, a tidbit, a tiny bit of a FREE 90-minute Live Coaching Session that I did on YouTube, which by the way, you won’t find it anywhere. Nobody’s coaching live on YouTube, let alone coaching people who actually suffer from Social Anxiety, real Social Anxiety sufferer, and we’re using tapping to do that.
This is really unique, this is really powerful and people who have loved watching it, some guy wrote on the comment sections underneath it “please, please do this again. This is my fourth time going through it”. And by the way, this is an hour and a half session, because I’ve gotten so much out of this. But there are a fair bit of people that are like “90 minutes – Oh my God, my attention span is about 7 minutes”.
Hopefully, this little taster will give you some juice to go check out the whole thing (if you haven’t already) because it’s really, really awesome because you can really relate to the people who are sharing their Social Anxiety story, and as you tap along, you’ll gain benefits from doing that too.
Now, we’re actually not going too deep into many things within this particular session on YouTube, but you’re going to get lots of insights, you’re going to feel better, you’re going to relief some of your anxiety or some of your tension, and you’re going to have an experience of the power of this technique, so that’s really cool.
Without further ado, check out the start of the 90-minute coaching session I did Live on YouTube. This little bit is with Victoria and we’re tapping on releasing the resistance to letting go of Social Anxiety and working towards acceptance of Social Anxiety.
Here we go.
Seb: So you know that I’m a former Social Anxiety Disorder sufferer, and it was very difficult to overcome my Social Anxiety. The mainstream approaches that I tried like facing my fears, changing my thoughts, meditation, NLP, etc., It all didn’t work, and eventually, I found this odd-looking technique called tapping where you tap with the tips of your fingers in a specific acupressure point in the body, and believe it or not – that actually works. And after a long period of time, it helped me to overcome my Social Anxiety. And at that point, I started coaching people to overcome their Social Anxiety using this particular technique.
I’ve been doing that since 2009 and now when Coronavirus kicked off, I did a 30-day challenge where I taught people with this technique, and I taught a whole bunch of people other concepts from both Traditional Western Psychology and Eastern Concepts that I’ve learned over the years that helped me overcome my Social Anxiety.
Now, we’re in the second 30-day challenge, and I was like “let’s do a live webinar”, not knowing that my main internet was going to cut out. But here we are, I’ve got 3 brave volunteers and I’m going to apply this technique with them. Do a little bit of demonstration of what that does.
If you’re watching this, what you can do to get some benefit from this is to just follow along, monkey- see, monkey- do. So even if you’re not exactly familiar with the technique, if you follow along, you’re still going to get some benefit. Because what this technique does, is it starts reducing the negative emotions that are causing or contributing to the problem of Social Anxiety.
While you won’t solve your Social Anxiety in this hour and a half that we’re going to do this, you’re likely going to feel some relief and you’re going to get some insights. You’re going to get some clues as to why you’re stuck and so on. So just be tapping throughout the whole session. Throughout this whole session, just be tapping. Then, see what happens. And if you decide that, you agree that you’re taking full responsibility for your own mental and emotional well-being.
So the disclaimer is out of the way. Let’s see how we’re going to do this.
I will start out with Victoria, and then Antoine, and Adi. Can you guys mute yourself?
Great. Hi Victoria!
Client: Hello!
Seb: Hello. So you’re familiar with the tapping points?
Client: I am, indeed. Yeah.
Seb: Great. Okay. So let’s first start with the level of nervousness, tension, and anxiety right now at this very moment.
Client: 6? 7?
Seb: Got you. By the way, thank you for volunteering. Thank you for being brave. I bet there are a lot of people watching this right now and like “I would never do that”. So excellent, very good!
First of all, what we want to do is we want to address the resistance to letting go of this anxiety. Because basically right now, at this moment, this anxiety is basically your system saying “I’m seeing a threat right now. There’s a danger that I’m seeing”, and that danger might “I’m going to say something stupid, or I won’t come off in the right way, or I’ll bore people or whatever it is”. There’s some kind of a risk in being here.
So just be calm and relax. “It’s a bad idea” – it’s basically what your brain is saying, and we want to acknowledge that fact and we do that by verbalizing the common reasons for why your subconscious mind, that deeper part of you that wants to keep you safe might not want to relax. So just follow along with me.
For those of you at home, say the same things. And of course, Antoine and Ady say the same thing.
Seb: (Tap under the nose) I don’t want to relax right now.
Client: I don’t want to relax right now.
Seb: (Tap on the chin) It’s not safe to relax.
Client: It’s not safe to relax.
Seb: (Tap on the collarbone) I can’t let go of my Social Anxiety.
Client: I can’t let go of my Social Anxiety.
Seb: (Tap under the arms) It’s part of who I am.
Client: It’s part of who I am.
Seb: On the liver point.
Client: I’ll skip that point.
Seb: Okay. Yeah. Sorry, you’re right.
(Tap on the wrist point) I don’t deserve to let go of my Social Anxiety.
Client: I don’t deserve to let go of my Social Anxiety.
Seb: (Tap on top of the head) Who would I be without it?
Client: Who would I be without it?
Seb: (Tap on the beginning of the eyebrows) I can’t let it go.
Client: I can’t let it go.
Seb: (Tap on the side of the eyes) It’s impossible to let go of it.
Client: It’s impossible to let go of it.
Seb: (Tap under the eyes) I don’t want to let go of my Social Anxiety.
Client: I don’t want to let go of my Social Anxiety.
Seb: (Tap under the nose) Yes, I do.
Client: Yes, I do.
Seb: (Tap on the chin) No, I don’t.
Client: No, I don’t.
Seb: (Tap on the collarbone) I release all my emotional attachments
Client: I release all my emotional attachments
Seb: To letting go
Client: To letting go
Seb: Of my Social Anxiety
Client: Of my Social Anxiety.
Seb: Now just observe what happens for a little bit as we let that sentence do its work.
(Tap under the arms) What are you noticing right now? No right or wrong answer, by the way. Don’t try to say anything to please me, it doesn’t please me. I’m just curious.
Client: No, I do feel more at ease, definitely. I’d say the number reduces.
Seb: Okay. And what’s the reduced number now?
Client: 4? Maybe even 3?
Seb: Okay. Got you. And while you tap on your wrist point, how is it that you’re aware of that anxiety? Is that like a lump in your throat? Is there tightness in your chest? Is that a butterfly in your stomach? It is that jitteriness? How are you aware of that?
Client: I’d say it’s in my stomach. I get quite hot as well, even if it’s cold. I know that it’s cold right now, but I feel really hot, it’s like I’m burning up. Yeah, mainly in my stomach is just a discomfort.
Seb: Got you. It’s definitely not cold here. I’m soon going to be sweating. So, are you feeling hot? Right now?
Client: I am, yes. It’s slowly disappearing.
Seb: Okay. All right. Good. So what we’ve talked about inside the challenge, what we’ve also tapped on and focused on was changing the relationship with our anxiety. And no longer seeing at as “I’m an anxious person, I’m upset about myself for having this, what’s wrong with me, and beating yourself up, that kind of stuff.
We started that process of accepting ourselves while we have this challenge with anxiety. Rather than that, we are an anxious person. We’ve also looked at what are the emotions that you feel about the fact that you get anxious, or when you are anxious, what are the emotions that you’re having that fact that you’re anxious?
In other words, are you accepting the anxiety?
I’ll give an example: I’m a Social Confidence coach and I’ve been doing this for a long time, Social Anxiety is not a problem anymore. And yesterday, I acknowledged that I was going to do a Live YouTube and I was going to coach three people. I’ve actually never done that.
I’ve coached three people in the same format before, but within my community where I already know that people kind of like me, and they appreciate the results that they’re getting. But Live on YouTube, not! So I noticed “Wow, I’m feeling a bit anxious about that”.
So yesterday evening, I’m like “Wow! Isn’t that fascinating? This is great! Opportunity for growth”. And what I didn’t do was beat myself up. What I didn’t do was feel guilty about it, or angry, or disappointed or whatever. And what I also felt was I could do it while anxious.
In fact, I feel a bit nervous right now. Also, I have to deal with the internet-breaking – that kind of stuff. But I can do it, while I’m feeling a bit of anxiety.
But yesterday, I’m like “Okay, well since I’m already in acceptance of the anxiety, what I can do is I can look at why is that anxiety there?” And there were some remnants of “Well, some people are really against me”. Hmm. Well, there’s a bit there that I hadn’t addressed yet, but in my crude normal life and all the things that I do, doesn’t come up. But now that I’m kind of stepping my game, if you will, it kind of present itself. So, I did 15 – 20 minutes of tapping and I was calm, looking forward to it.
Anyway, that’s a long story to kind of you “Are you in acceptance of your anxiety right now? And if not, what are the feelings that you have about it?”
Client: So, Uhm. I am totally new to all of this. I mean, this is literally Day 20 of my self- help at all. So it’s…
Seb: Wow.
Client: Yeah. So to be here is quite a big deal. But yeah, no. I always hate and I always beat up myself about it. But today and in the past week or so, I’ve kind of told my body, you know, my body’s just trying to keep me safe. It’s doing what it can to keep me out of danger, and in that, I do appreciate it now to some extent. It is kind of easier to keep under control which in 20 days, it’s a massive, massive step.
Seb: Fantastic! I’m happy to hear it. That’s great! Cool! So that means that you’re already in acceptance of the anxiety. And right, just earlier what we did was we cleared the resistance to let go of the anxiety which means that you’re now kind of in a good place to do some more work. Meaning, look at the reasons for why the anxiety is there.
Great! So that means I’m going to leave you for a second and I’m going to go to the next one and I’ll come back to you later. Is that okay?
Client: Yup. No problem.
Seb: And the anxiety right now is a?
Client: 3?
Seb: By the 3. Okay.
All right. I hope you enjoyed this.
To see the full 90-minute coaching session where I work with the other people as well, you can go to bit.ly/livesocialanxietycoaching. That is bit.ly/livesocialanxietycoaching.
Talk to you soon. Bye for now.
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