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I can’t achieve full acceptance; I cannot neutralise my negative emotions completely. What should I do?
Not a problem. For some people, it is easier to achieve this than it is for others. Gaining full acceptance of your social anxiety may be a work in progress for you, meaning it is something you come back to over and over again.
Whenever you notice yourself in non-acceptance, you tap. Slowly but surely, you will start gaining more acceptance of your anxiety as the meaning off it will start to change for you. You will of course never like it, but you will start to realise that getting upset about it is not benefiting you, and that it is merely a challenge that you are dealing with, a challenge you are in the process of overcoming.
What you should do now is reduce the negative emotions as much as you can, and then move forward to the next step in the social confidence system. After a few steps, or when you notice yourself in non-acceptance, you can come back to the step and try again.
How long should I work on this section on acceptance?
The idea is to gain acceptance. That doesn’t mean you like that you’re dealing with this challenge, it means you have accepted the status quo. When you no longer feel negative emotions about having social anxiety, and you no longer judge yourself for having it, you’re ready to move on to step 2.
And, if you’re not sure whether you should move on to step 2, move on to step 2 anyway because you can always come back to this step (and you likely will come back to it as full acceptance takes some repetition to solidify completely) when you notice that you are feeling bad about your social anxiety, your situation, or when you are judging yourself for having social anxiety.
Regarding moving forward in the system, do what you think is best for you. If you think you’re done with one step, move on to the next.
If you don’t know whether to move forward or not, just guess and then follow your guess. And when you really don’t know, always move forward in the system cause you can always return to a previous step and there are very powerful exercises at each step of the SCS.