We are at the midpoint of releasing a free social confidence video series. I’m condensing down 15 years of insight into social anxiety solutions after overcoming it and coaching 5000 hours to help 100s of socially anxious clients do the same. I see the patterns and what works and now I’m giving away a taste of that for FREE for a limited time.
In this video, I’ll be sharing with you some of the top comments I’ve received underneath the free training.
Check it out for yourself and signup for it here.
There are two more to go, but you can go back and check out all of the training and the PDFs there. These are jam packed full of content. I hope to see you over there.
Sebastiaan: Hello this is Sebastiaan from social-anxiety-solutions.com. I am a former social anxiety sufferer. I’m a social confidence coach and I help people who have social anxiety feel calm and relaxed in social situations that they can have a good time, enjoy themselves, joke around, make connections, have a great social life and all of that kind of good stuff.
And I been teaching people how to do this for quite a long time. My first video on YouTube is stems from 2009 so, over nine years in and my website from 2008. I’ve been teaching people a specific technique called EFT. It stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. It’s a psychological form of acupuncture but instead of using needles you tip with the tips of your fingers at specific acupressure points in the body. It looks really weird, looks very bizarre but what it does is it releases excessive negative emotions and it brings you back into emotional balance and you relax.
Okay. So, that’s a quick intro. Now I am currently in the middle of releasing a free video series where I summarize 15 years of insight into social anxiety and the solutions to it. And I’ve overcome my own social anxiety, I have coached hundreds of socially anxious clients since 2009 close to 5,000 coaching hours and if you’re doing that much focus on one particular topic it’d be stupid not to see the patterns. And so, I’m talking a lot about the patterns that what I’ve seen that doesn’t work and what I’ve seen that works over and over and over again. And I teach all of those things in this free video series.
The first video is called “How to overcome social anxiety without forcefully facing your fears”. This is a different approach than the mainstream approach that says “Change your thoughts, be mindful and forcefully face your fears. Progressively face your fears”. But I say forcefully because the approach that I’m suggesting doesn’t require you to face your fears in that kind of way instead you internally look at why is it that you have such excessive fear off rejection or embarrassing yourself or blushing. Well, because you learned it. And you can unlearn it with the tapping. How to do that is what I go into in these training videos.
The second video that I’ve released is called “Five main reasons people fail to overcome their social anxiety using a tapping”. And then dive into excruciating detail on how to exactly they’ll do that and what psychologically is going on when you’re not getting any results and what the solutions are to start getting results? It’s a really kick-ass video. It’s four videos in a video series. Two have been released so far. Two more to come and it’s not going to be online there for always so go and have a look at it while you can.
Now in this week’s video podcast however you’re consuming this information I just want to go over some of the top comments that I got onto those videos. So, here we go.
First one. It’s from Pier-Luc. I hope I’m saying that right.
“Hi, I wanted to say that this technique helped to release a big amount of tension in my body and I can literally feel it. I’m surprised. I struggled with social anxiety all my life and I have a lot of painful memories and this technique you are sharing seems to work. Thank you!”
Alright just as a quick note so in the first video I guide people through an exercise of this tapping and so he reports on how he’s feeling better. Big amount of tension in his body released, that’s a common experience.
Now I don’t know where this person is from. I’m assuming it’s from Russia and I don’t really know how to read this but I’m just going to give it a go. Bianca Ochenko (Вика Осипенко). Anyway, I’m butchering that and if you’re watching this sorry, please let me know how you pronounce that. –
“Hello, Sebastiaan. When I was listening to you talking about bullying it gave me goosebumps. Before tapping I felt angry and frustrated about my social anxiety 9 out of 10 strong and it went down to 4 out of 10. Thanks a lot”.
Great. And so, people are sharing how the tapping that I’ve guided them through has released some of the feelings in their body which is what the tapping does. Very awesome. Some people are sharing their story like this person goes by the name of Forever Fateful.
“Hi. I wanna share my story. The first time I felt so nervous is when I was on 5th grade. I had to recite our school mission and vision and sing our national anthem in front of my teacher. I felt like my hands were shaking, sweating and can’t breathe properly but I still made it. Since that day whenever I have to recite something or stand in front of the class, I feel nervous.
Also I felt really nervous when I delivered my graduation speech on 6th grade. My voice is kinda shaky, my hands are sweating and felt like numb and going down the stage my knees felt weak. As I entered high school it got worse. Now I’m on 11th grade, I still suffer and It’s hard for me during first day of school.
And It’s common for students to stand in front and discuss their presentation which is I really hate. I feel soooo sooo nervous that my hands gets numb and shaky and heart racing. We always do presentations and next week It’ll be my turn to stand in front of the class and speak. I’m skinny since I was a kid and now whenever I meet a person I know, they always point out how skinny I am, they even ask me If I even eat. When I go to the board and answer, I will hear someone talking about how skinny I am.
After speaking in front of class and going back to my seat, there’s my classmate who told me that I look weird and I look sick in front that made me so uncomfortable. It’s hard for me to accept and love my self when all I can hear are those things. My body has become my biggest insecurity and when they talk about it, I feel so down easily and I’m going to overthink again. I get too much affected by the negative comments I get from people. I wish I could just overcome this easily. I’m aiming to still be on top of the class but with anxiety I don’t think I can make it.”
Now, we’ve got quite a conversation going on under these videos, as I asked people to comment so we can have a community going on and I’m replying to all of these comments. So, here’s my reply to Forever Faithful, whether that’s a boy or girl.
“Hi, your brain is still reliving the trauma of that experience (and I’m referring to the trauma of her experience in fifth grade) Over and over. And there’s a lot of self acceptance work that’s in store for you, if you want to overcome this problem. When you are OK with your body, other people’s comments won’t bother you.
And, when you’re not reactive to these comments, the comments usually stop pretty quickly. Once I became OK with my ears and I was no longer reacting to people’s teasing, the fun got out of it for them. They no longer looked cool when they teased me. Thanks for sharing your story. Stay tuned.”
Okay, and then I picked out some of the comments of people that have gotten results using the tapping over time. Which is cool so.
missmariemac:“Who lies more…men or women (lol) I’ve been following you for years now and your story and work is SO inspirational. I have made great strides in my social anxiety. I can go into social situations now not reeling with anxiety and negative thoughts – I’m more relaxed and don’t worry so much. Love your vision of bringing this to the masses – it is so needed. Thanks Sebastiaan for all you do.”
So that’s very cool. So next, this is the same lady as before but this is a comment to the second video (Вика Осипенко): Thanks a lot for the video! It gives so many valuable tips on how to tap on painful memories. I’ve been working with resistance and SSEs for half a year already and this month I noticed quite a tangible shift. I’m a teacher of English (mostly teach adults) and I was afraid of my students 7-5 and now it’s 4-2 and goes to 7 only when there is a triggering situation. I’m really grateful for all the videos and podcasts!
I had an old client pop by as well. John Farrar: “Seb, Great video man. I especially like the time you spend on what social anxiety actually is. The new animation is great as well. Thanks for all your time and effort. The sessions that I did with you in the past changed my life and set me free. Keep up the good work.”
And then stevejd said: “Thank you for this video Sebastiaan. You explain things so clearly and make me feel positive about defeating my social anxiety and negative thinking. I’ve had enough of feeling inferior to everyone, ugly and pretty much a failure, and avoiding people because of it. I don’t want to live in such isolation anymore. Looking forward to the next video.”
And then finally, this is a comment to the second video by Kate Strong: Seb, you landed the plane 🙂 OK here’s why I like these longer videos, because you talk so much and cover so much ground that you say things you’ve not thought to say in the smaller bites on youtube. I picked up some gems here. What you said about social confidence skills, that when your body is screaming at you to run, fight, hide, firstly, I never thought of hiding as part of the alarm system, because I can get that feeling even being on the computer on say facebook.
And the biggest gem you said that I just didnt even think about, and its crazy after doing EFT for so long that I never thought about it, shows you how scared I am being in my body, is you were talking about physical sensations being aspects. The biggest thing for me is living my life in 3D, I find the physicality of life hard, gravity for me is like wading through mud. And I never thought to tap on the sensations as aspects. I usually relate to the emotions or the anxiety. But I also dont tap on how I feel about the sensations. Boom!!! Thank you so much. :)””
Yeah, so, she’s referring to how we have emotional reactions to the physical sensations that we have in our body so when you… as I understand it at least. So, when you have your heart race like crazy and you think about that and you get scared then you have an emotional reaction to the bodily sensation and that’s something that you can tap on as well.
Anyway, so, we’re in the middle of all of it. It’s very exciting. There’s a cool conversation going. If you haven’t checked out these videos yet go to the following link bit.ly/socialconfidencetraining.
So, that’s B-I-T. So, Bravo, India, Tango dot L-Y. So, that Lima, Yogurt. Forward slash social confidence training one word and that will bring you to the two videos that are live for you right now.
Again, this is the best of all my work together and watching this is going to really empower you and you’re really going to find a lot of benefit from it. It’s worth your time, go check it out and I will talk to you soon. Bye for now.