What if you didn’t have to force yourself to face your fears?
What if it doesn’t take years of therapy with only little results?
Imagine a relatively painless, effective approach to overcome your social anxiety…
Via online Skype coaching I’ll coach you while you sit behind your PC in the comfort of your own home.
During our coaching sessions we eliminate the negative emotions (shame, fears, anxieties, embarrassment, etc.) that keep you stuck. Together, we’ll neutralise your limiting beliefs so you can feel safe socially.
I’ve suffered from social anxiety for nearly a decade before I stumbled unto possible solutions. That’s about 14 years ago now. I’ve since dedicated my life to resolving my own social anxiety, and helping others do the same. Thankfully, I’ve been social anxiety free for years now, and I’ve been coaching socially anxious clients full time since October 2009.
I combine Modern psychology with the new and emerging field of Energy psychology, allowing people to overcome social anxiety much faster, with less stress. And, using this combined approach, you can become completely anxiety-free.
Has overcome his own social anxiety
Has worked with hundreds of socially anxious clients for thousands of hours
After my 3 sessions with Sebastiaan I've noticed marked differences in how I felt during social situations, I felt more at ease and able to contribute to conversations and really enjoy myself without having to worry about what others thought of me.Even though I still feel anxiety at times, I believe it is no more than a normal person would feel, and it does not affect me in a negative way.
My social anxiety is no longer controlling my life, and I am so grateful for that!
I've been good. In fact I've had tremendous improvement on my social anxiety since our second session. I can't say it's completely gone but I have had major improvements and it doesn’t even cross my mind anymore most of the time. I will book a session soon for our last session.
If you're used to hearing mainstream solution to social anxiety, what I promise probably sounds "too good to be true" or "the next scam". Which is why I offer my free 20-min intro chat.
Once you’ve applied for an intro-chat I’ll contact you by e-mail within 24 hours.
In the email you’ll find a link to my online calendar. You can then schedule our chat at a time that works for you.
During an intro-chat I ask you a few questions about your situation. I ask these to make sure I am the best person to help you. During our chat you can ask me anything you like, and you can see if you feel we're a "good fit".
After the 20-min chat I’ll let you know what I think would be your best option. You can tell me either then and there if you want to work together, or later via email.
To apply, put your name and email below and I will get back to you within 24 hours.
There are no endless hours of talking about your problems. No reliving of painful trauma. And no forcing of yourself to awkwardly face your fears…
… Just positive steps that go directly to the core of your social anxiety. So you feel better, energised and relieved after every single session.
Overcoming your social anxiety does not have to be a struggle.
The key to our coaching sessions is eliminating the negative emotions (shame, fears, anxieties, embarrassment, etc.) that hold you back.
Together, we’ll change your irrational, self-limiting beliefs into powerful and positive ones.
Yes, you might experience a brief flurry of negative emotions... yet you won't dwell on them any longer than necessary.
I'm talking about minutes here.
While you will tune in to negative emotions and memories from the past, the emotional upset you experience is short-lived.
With EFT -and other energy psychology techniques- we get rid of the pain gently and efficiently.
You do not have to force yourself to face your fears.
No awkward exposures necessary.
This is not CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). You do face your fears, but you do so internally first.
I help you get to the root of your fears. And using EFT we then effectively neutralise it.
After this you will face the situation you formerly feared with confidence.
EFT involves you tapping on certain acupressure points on your face and body.
During our coaching sessions I will instruct you where to tap, and what to say.
You'll be copying me. You tap where I tap, and you repeat what I say.
Yes, that looks a bit silly at first. But, you won't need to do that in public.
I will teach you some tricks to use the tapping in public without other people noticing it.
So aside from tapping inside the privacy of your own home, no you won't look foolish.
In fact, nobody has to know that you're getting rid of your social anxiety, as you're doing the tapping from the comfort of your own home.
When you have tried a lot of things and nothing has worked...
it's common to start to feel hopeless you will ever overcome your problem.
But this kind of coaching is nothing like you have tried before. This is an entirely different approach.
Let’s look at some logic and reason.
You’re not born anxious. Which means you learned how to become anxious.
From painful experiences in your past you created negative limiting beliefs.
These beliefs cause your brain to perceive danger in social situations.
This perception of danger activates the fight, flight, freeze response.
This results in anxiety. The animated video I created explains this quite well:
I will help you find the experiences that led to your social anxiety. With EFT we then neutralise these, and in doing so get rid of the limiting beliefs.
Once we’ve changed the core beliefs responsible for your mind perceiving danger…
… the built-in response to danger (fight, flight, or freeze response) won’t get activated.
And your anxiety will be gone.
EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques and is part of a powerful new field called Energy Psychology (EP).
EP combines established Western approaches to therapy, such as exposure therapy (a researched and established Western approach to treatment) with non-Western, holistic techniques of healing and spiritual development.
EFT is an unusual looking tapping technique that combines ancient Chinese acupressure with modern psychology to quickly shift the brain’s neural pathways.
EFT has been proven to be effective and can help you process trauma, release negative emotions (shame, hurt, fear, anxiety, guilt, etc) and change negative limiting beliefs often much faster than conventional therapy can.
EFT is not a placebo. You don't have to believe in it for it to work.
EFT is also not a distraction technique. To the contrary, when you use EFT you specifically focus on the problem while you stimulate certain acupressure points on the face and body.
While it's a relatively new approach (about 20 years old) it's beginning to become mainstream.
EFT was featured on the Dr Oz show, the Huffington post, Psychology today, etc.
Personal development experts like Tony Robbins and Wayne Dyer recommend it.
The techniques of EP have provided me with invaluable tools for working with trauma. No therapist can afford to remain ignorant of this new and exciting field.
EFT is being used by millions of people worldwide, and leading voices in the psychology world recommend it.
EP techniques and procedures can bring about remarkably rapid changes in the way people feel.
In the below video you see the results of EFT experts working with war veterans suffering from PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - one of the worst anxiety-disorders).
The transformation of these people is so obvious and profound, that this is what made me give EFT a committed try.
If you're skeptical, there's probably nothing I can say that will convince you that EFT is the real deal. And that's OK, maybe it's not your thing.
However, I know that when you give this a committed try (and get help when you need it), you'll become a raving fan.
Because when you feel something shift inside of you, that change is undeniable.
And when you rapidly release a sense of shame or a feeling of fear that's been with you for decades, you'll know EFT is the real deal.
Don't disregard this, give it a committed try. You'll have your (inner) world rocked.
Anywhere from a couple of weeks, to a couple of months.
How long this will take depends on a variety of factors.
Like how intense and pervasive your social anxiety is and how challenging your past has been.
And how much (subconscious) resistance you have. Or what your current life experience looks like.
Every person is unique and every situation is unique. So it's impossible to give you an exact prediction. However...
Your social anxiety problem can be broken down into smaller pieces. And using EFT we focus on getting rid of one piece of your problem at a time.
Step by step you’ll start feeling more and more confident and at ease.
And in a relatively short time you will be able to just be yourself and enjoy social situations like others can.
I can give you an estimation, based upon 6 years of solely coaching socially phobic clients.
Here are the averages:
More than 90% of people experience an emotional shift after the first session.
They feel something has changed. They report feeling lighter, more comfortable, happier, more at peace, more optimistic.
Some people are done in just 3 sessions. About 35% of people is free of social anxiety in 3 weeks.
Others who have very severe social anxiety I see for more sessions. However...
Just about all people I work with experience life transforming results within 3 sessions.
What I can promise you, is that you will start to feel more calm and confident after each and every session.
And, you can expect a progressive reduction of your social anxiety.
Having overcome my own social anxiety, I can personally relate your problem.
I am specialised in helping people overcome social anxiety. I solely work with socially anxious clients.
Since Oct 2009 I have helped hundreds of socially anxious clients for thousands of hours.
I know you can get rid of this too.
You might prefer working with me because:
You can definitely use EFT on your own.
And when you...
1. Take the time required to study it.
2. Gain experience using it.
... you are likely able to make some progress on your own.
However, “some progress” and “life-changing results” is a world of difference.
The results you are able to get on your own vs the results you get when working with an experienced coach is bigger than huge.
Overcoming your social anxiety is challenging.
Even if you’ve studied and know all about EFT…
You need to uncover the right past events that led to your current suffering.
Find the beliefs that cause the perception of danger. Know how to change them effectively...
... there is (subconscious) resistance that needs to be uncovered and overcome.
You need to know what to do when you get stuck, and why you get stuck.
And you need persistence to clear out every last trigger.
In short: It’s quite a puzzle solve on your own.
I don’t know of anyone who has done it on his own. I have had a lot of outside help myself.
The real deeper issues we are often blind to consciously (we have so-called "subconscious blinds-spots")
Having had someone guide me, who has the perspective has been life-changing.
One EFT Master says “even the best surgeon can’t remove his own appendix”.
You could start out on your own, and work with a coach once you’ve reached a plateau.
Or, you can start out with a coach and get a head-start.
Or, you can be guided and supported on your whole journey to social comfort.
Working with an experienced coach you can overcome your social anxiety in the most gentle and quickest way.
Most people I work with don’t know what caused their social anxiety. In fact, I’d say about 75% of them either don’t know, or what they think is the cause turns out not to be the cause.
This is because often the causes are hidden to you consciously. But your subconscious mind has all the answers.
During the coaching process I’m using some simple and efficient techniques to help you get to the root of your problems.
You don’t need to worry about doing it wrong, you simply follow my lead.
Finding the causes of your social anxiety is not your job.
I’ll help you uncover the repetitive negative experiences, the (mini)-trauma’s, the resistance to letting it go and the negative limiting beliefs.
This is an easy process, and often quite fun (as you can hear and read in the testimonials on this page).
Together we form a team and we will uproot whatever it is that caused, and is perpetuating your social anxiety.
You don’t need to have a traumatic childhood in order to develop social anxiety.
The events responsible for your social anxiety can be subtle. It can be a critical father, an anxious mom, or being compared to your older brother.
And sometimes a single experience can kick-start it.
Plus, something that was terrible to you as a 7 year old, can be seen to you as “insignificant” as an adult.
You might not consciously know why you're anxious, but I can assure you there is a reason, and it can be found and eliminated.
You don’t need to worry about “where it came from” during coaching.
Your subconscious mind knows exactly what is causing your social anxiety.
And, with some gentle guidance it will naturally present what needs resolution.
After just one session, those feelings of discomfort had completely vanished, I found myself feeling completely calm and relaxed in situations that had previously made me stiffen up, feel self conscious, awkward and generally very uncomfortable. The results I have had have been amazing. After many years of trying various things in vain, I have seen spectacular results very quickly since working with sebastiaan. Quite frankly, I have never felt better and I strongly recommend his work, it has done wonders for me.
As a psychotherapist myself with a history of social anxiety, talk therapy alone just wasn’t cutting it. Now I see the value of using a strong experiential component to give the painful feelings a chance to move out after being evoked.
That’s why the tapping works so well and quickly. It helps move out the feelings that Sebastiaan helps to call up.
Before I started tapping with Sebastiaan, I struggled with social anxiety for years worrying about sweating and blushing, embarrassment and humiliation, and anticipating all kinds of situations with trepidation.
I would isolate and hide to protect myself…
... and I’m a person who loves connection.
But I was really afraid of being judged as a freak and then devalued, rejected and dismissed because of it. It really limited my life.
It created unnecessary dependencies and A LOT of negative thoughts and beliefs about myself, a lot of shame, hopelessness, fear and an unwillingness to move forward in life. Boy was I doing a dance to get through every day.
The frustration and all that toxic energy that I was holding in my system was very uncomfortable. I was afraid to go to parties and definitely really scared to go alone.
I felt like I needed to please people to be accepted. I would hide from authority figures. I had trouble being assertive even though I have strong preferences.
The tapping sessions I’ve been doing with Sebastiaan have helped significantly. I have been in a lot of different types of therapy over the years and for me, this one is remarkably effective.
The combination of the tapping technique and Sebastiaan’s skills and insight have created more forward movement in a short period of time than ever before.
He really is an expert on social anxiety and all of the traps that a person with social anxiety finds himself in.
And I’m not gonna lie, I’m so impressed by him. It’s the combination of his ability to be highly attuned and so articulate that works so well.
His precision cuts through the walls and defenses, gets me in touch with the deeper feelings and assumptions, and with the tapping, moves it out… all while giving me a new and more effective way to frame how I can approach future situations feeling safe and interested in embracing life.
I’m happy to report that now I’m trying lots of things that I used to be afraid of.
I’m more interested in going to parties and I’m actually enjoying them. I’m less isolated and feel more secure with myself to engage with all different kinds of people.
I’m getting more in touch with what’s important to me and feel hopeful, and I’m so much less depressed.
My anxiety has reduced significantly.
When I do feel anxious as I try new things, I don’t shame myself for blushing or sweating or looking nervous.
I’m more proud of myself for sticking with it even when it’s uncomfortable.
Recently, I invited someone I was chatting with in line at a restaurant to join me and have a meal together. I NEVER would have done that before. It was exhilarating.
I went to a wedding reception on my own and it was fine. I’m excited to keep discovering myself. I’m excited to keep trusting myself and what I know is important to me. I’m learning to be less afraid of the unknown.
I’m even learning to let go of other people’s perceptions of me as I concern myself more with my own self acceptance.
My advice, give Sebastiian and this process a try. The proof is in the pudding. You’ll know if it’s working in a short period of time. No need to guess.
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